1 Year Married, 8 Years Together
I can still remember wondering what it must have felt like to have a boyfriend. It seemed like every girl had one except me. It probably wasn’t too much of a mystery as to why, though. I was not exactly what a young guy would call attractive. Bushy eyebrows + awkward pre-teen body + even more awkward personality = no interest from the opposite sex. I look back and just don’t even care anymore (because time heals all wounds – just kidding), but back then, it kind of sucked. Actually, looking back at it, I’m glad I didn’t have a boyfriend at any age earlier than when I met the guy who is now my husband. It simply would have complicated things and added unnecessary drama to my life that no kid needs at such a young age. Lucky for me, some extent of puberty kicked in somewhere around my junior year of high school and I got a little cuter I guess.
My husband James and I met when we were both 17, at my high school senior prom. James went to another school and had come with another girl in my class. I remember seeing him in the crowd of people and thinking, “that guy looks a little old to be at a high school senior prom!” James has apparently looked a lot older than he actually is ever since he was pretty young. We’ll see how that works out years from now, because I personally plan on looking young and fabulous for decades to come (don’t let me down, Asian genes)! He turned out to know my 2 best guy friends who my best (girl)friend and I had come with, so we were introduced.
The rest of the story involves Facebook, Panda Express, movies, and me being nonchalant about the whole thing for several months until I finally committed, I guess as best as a then-18-year-old could commit to a relationship – a first relationship at that – with a guy who was 3 months younger than me but 2 years behind me in school years (he is a smart guy, I promise)! Oh, and on top of that, “James” is the name of my brother. I remember thinking, “I can’t end up with this guy. His name is James. And he is going to be a junior while I just graduated from high school. And he is my first boyfriend. Yeah, not happening.”
Obviously, that didn’t work out, and our relationship did. Over the course of the next 8 years up until today, we broke up once – for a day, moved out of state and back home again, rented our first apartment together, adopted a dog (ok, that was me :)), gone through 8+ jobs combined, got married, bought a house, and of course had our first child. I’ll happily admit that our relationship has been pretty uneventful for the most part, and we tend to like it that way. Our personalities are entirely different, but our values are the same. What really makes it work though, is our true love for each other, made of patience, trust, humility – lots of humility, and respect. He is lucky to have me, because I know my worth (is there a less cliché phrase I can use here? Ugh.), but I am more lucky to have him. Not lucky – blessed. So very blessed. 1 year married, 8 years together, and I’m so excited for the rest!